The church was really big with tons of people crammed into the auditorium. I don’t remember too much about the particulars. I just remember at some point looking down the aisle at my family and friends all lined up side by side. Every face was pinched. Every shoulder tight. Every back stiff. I don’t even remember what we all said afterward about the experience. I just remember that one moment.

A few of us have gone back to church on a regular basis. Some have officially joined congregations and are very happy with the community of believers they are connected with. Some of us go to church every so often– maybe still looking for a good fit, only wanting small doses of organized religion, or being unable/unwilling to delve any deeper than surface level. Some of us do not go to church at all. Haven’t gone for years now. Have no desire whatsoever to go again.

At this point in the game, I am in category B. We have only been to church once in the last 9 months (maybe that puts me in B1/2 – closer to C than I realized). I don’t know. I just don’t get much out of it. Maybe if “The Ultimate Church!” were near us, things would be different. But, as it is, we have to drive an hour one way just to get to where any churches are, so seriously, unless that church is really amazing, it’s not worth it to me.

I used to feel so strongly about finding a really great church that I would have moved anywhere in the world just to be a part of that. With that mind set, I ended up in a cult. I think I will take a more relaxed approach toward the subject now. So, I am not totally closed to the idea of church. I just don’t feel like it is an essential part of life.